Thursday, November 29, 2012

Stumped


            Try as I may, there are some things that I cannot answer…correctly. I consider myself an educated person, interact on a daily basis with educated people, and spend much of my time at work researching things such as “Ligers” (google it, you’ll be hooked)  and when to use “Who” or “Whom.” There are a few things in life that stump me though, and the majority of those few things are questions from the curious mind of my 3 year old. Yes, I realize that all kids ask “why” all of the time, but I really do try to give the correct answers to him, and because of this Benji seems able to think and reason at the level of a certified genius. Some of the questions are simple…and some, not so much…

Saturday at the grocery store…

Ben: I gotta go potty.

Me: Okay, I do too, let’s go.

Ben: Wanna play swords?

Me: Umm…NO.

Ben: Why?

Me: Umm…let’s just go potty.

How do you answer that in public and why do little boys think that playing “swords” in the bathroom is the coolest thing in the world?
 

A few weeks ago, Ben in the bathroom at our house…

Ben: I pooped!

Me: Did you wipe?

Ben: No.

Me: You need to go back in to the bathroom and wipe.

Ben: Why?

Me: So your butt doesn’t itch.


And…


An ongoing battle…

Me: Ben, take your fingers out of your mouth.

Ben: Why?

Me: So you don’t get worms

Ben: Why?

Me: They’ll make your butt itch.

Ben: Why?

Me: I don’t know, just stop chewing on your fingers.


So, in life, I’ve found that there are some really great answers to some really great questions, and then there are the questions that seem so simple, but we have no idea how to answer them. My poor child is going to grow up believing that chewing on his fingernails will give him worms (which is what my childhood babysitter used to tell us…thanks Sharon), simply because I can’t explain germs to him because he can’t physically see them. It’s funny to me that the older my children get, the dumber I feel!

Thuggle

Thought I'd share my most recent picture of one of my furbabies. This is Mason, a puggle. He's posing for his latest "pugshot". Beware...don't piss a "thuggle" off.


Monday, November 19, 2012

A Fabulous Beginning...


            I sit here in my oversized lounge chair and stare at one bright blue sock on my right foot, and a Santa Claus sock on my left foot, and wonder how on earth I’m going to raise two children. I see how my dogs act and rarely refrain from naughtiness, and I again wonder how this is going to work out. I remember when first became pregnant with Benji, my brother John sat me down and told me that parenting is the absolute hardest job that I will ever have, but the best job I’ll ever have too. Being the much older brother that he is to me, he usually has very well thought out and heartfelt advice, and this was no exception. Parenting is definitely a test of my heart and soul, and although I may sound like a horrible person for what I’m about to say, I think most of you will understand what I mean…and if you don’t, I’ve come to the conclusion that you’re lying. Sometimes I don’t like my kids.

            When I get home from work, rush around to make dinner, notice but deny the mess of toys and clothes covering my living room floor, serve dinner only to hear, “eeeeewwwww. It has green things in it” or “eeeeewww…I don’t like _________ (fill in the blank),” I don’t like my kids.  When it seems like all I need to do is take a nap, but that’s the last thing my kids need to do…I don’t like my kids. And when my husband and I have a knockdown, drag out about a parenting technique because of a bad behavior that one of my kids displayed, I don’t like my kids very much. But…just because I don’t like my kids very much sometimes, doesn’t mean that I don’t love my kids with every inch of my being every moment of my existence. And with that being said, here is what I want for the kids that I don’t like sometimes…

1. Happiness

2. Health

3. Bliss

4. Knowledge

5. Integrity

6. Desire

7. Imagination

8. Dreams

9. Love

10. A good dog.

            Some of these things can be taught, bought, or made, but most come from within, and as a parent, I don’t know exactly how to “put” these things inside my kids. I feel fortunate as my parents figured it out. They strategically placed each and every one of these things into their three completely different children at different times in their lives. Aside from the good dog (Eddie the Wonder Dog) in those critical middle school years when nothing else made sense, I’m not sure when my parents “put” these inside of me.  I truly hope that one of these days I’ll figure it out for my own children, as for now I think picking out matching socks would be a fabulous beginning.  
 
 

Sunday, November 18, 2012

Menards


          It’s rare that our family has time to do nothing, and when we are free to do nothing together, we feel the sudden urge to do something purposeless. Today we decided to leave the house a mess and head to Menards! Exhilarating, I know. I quickly made PB&J sandwiches for the kids, convincing Benji that “it’s the kind of peanut butter without peanuts,” after his rather sudden aversion to peanuts. Adam made a PB&J for himself, I helped myself to a meatless hamburger of which I’m not sure why I bought since I’m not a vegetarian by any means, and topped everyone’s lunch off with potato chips and grapes, which made it a healthy meal! Benji made himself chocolate milk, but refused to drink it because it was too cold. During our meal, I explained to him that most things that come straight out of the refrigerator are cold, he refused to believe me and the milk went to waste. Trying to practice my skill of patience, I ignored the fact that the milk was too cold, and finished my meatless burger with a smile on my face. After an extended lunch because Presley wanted to play rather than eat, we gathered the kids and jumped in the car for our family trip to Menards!

          It wasn’t until we got there that I realized I hadn’t packed diapers or wipes for Presley, or extra underwear and pants for Benji…necessities at this point in our lives. Typically these items remain somewhere in the car, except for today. As Presley sat happily in her own poop, we continued to smell it. She didn’t mind, and like the perfect parents we are, we pretended that we didn’t know that she needed a new diaper. Benji and I wandered off to another part of the store. By now you would think I would have learned my lesson about toy isles, apparently I haven’t. DON’T EVER LET YOUR KIDS WANDER THROUGH TOY ISLES! If you don’t have an intention of buying a toy, it is most definitely a tantrum waiting to happen…and the wait wasn’t long. Benji wanted everything in the store, Christmas lights, a blow up Santa riding a Harley, fluorescent lighting, Stockings, wrapping paper, a leather chair, and of course, all of the toys in the toy isles. After refusing to leave the toy isle and being placed inside the basket of the cart, and then trying to leap out, I left Adam in the store with little smelly and headed to the car with my toyless wonder. He continued to scream in the car until Adam and Presley finally arrived, and then just pouted. Part of this is our fault, a nap was far overdue, however the trip to Menards sounded so appealing that we had decided to forego the nap, bad idea.

          I’m now sitting here in my silent but messy house with Presley sleeping in her crib, Ben finally asleep in his bed, and Adam, next to me on the couch sound asleep. Next time I’ll make sure the whole family has naps BEFORE we head out on an adventure…and as for the diaper situation, the car is fully re-stocked!